A Million Ways To Run

We are never alone in our hardships, and rough times. Sometimes it feels that way, and the way we may deal with that may not always be the best choice. I think because some of us feel alone in a situation that is why we want to take the easy way out, or the easiest answer to get rid of pain or uncomfortable feelings; run away from all those feelings. At some point we may realize that the way we deal with situations may not be working anymore, and this song is about that turn around and realization that we have to actually be truthful and face our problems. It also shows that we are not alone with our feelings, there are others out there coping in similar ways. I think Terri Clark's A Million Ways To Run really expresses what some people do go through, it's a very honest song, and a very strong song.

In the basement of the church.
I took the last chair in the room
Embarrassed and ashamed,
but that all began to change,
when she stood up and spoke her truth.

She said ” I came here years ago, when I lost my sanity,
I hit an all time-low,
but then I found serenity.
I took shelter hiding from the pain, in any place
to make it go away.

CHORUS
In the arms of a stranger
keeping company with danger,
or staring’ down the barrel of a gun
At the bottom of a bottle,
getting numb with every swallow,
it’s easy, when it’s what you’ve always done,
With a Million Ways to Run

I was the first one out the door
But her words echoed in my head
I took the long way home
but no longer felt alone
Cause I’d lived everything she said
I thought about lost moments of my past
And then I knew, there was no going back…..

To the arms of a stranger
Keeping company with danger
or staring’ down the barrel of a gun
The bottom of a bottle,
Getting numb with every swallow
Cause it’s easy, when it’s what you’ve always done
With a Million Ways to Run

BRIDGE
There’s a freedom I have found
In staying on the ground
Long enough, to chase those demons down….

And I thank God I know I’m Not the only one,
with A Million ways to run…..

The entire album called The Long Way Home, that this song is on, is amazing!

Scream 4??

It's been announce that the Scream franchise is going to go ahead on Scream 4. I am not ashamed to say that I do enjoy all 3 of the films. I think they are actually really well done, albeit cheesy. Which is ok, its meant to be, it is a parody of sorts. Which is probably why I enjoy it. I love horror films, and Scream is right on with the stereotyping of them. The victim always makes the wrong choices, and they even state in the film what not to do when being stalked by a killer, yet they still do it. All three films tie in together with Sidney always being the victim, the one being hunted by ghostface. And all the killers are connected to Sidney and her mother in some way, and are all connected to each other. The third being the killer that actually started it all from the beginning by sending Billy Loomis out on his mission. The trilogy kind of made a circle with that third film bringing it back to the first in that sense. It felt like there was a close to the killers out for Sidney, that man behind the murder's/mask was dead.

Most trilogies I only like 2, or sometimes only the first one. Like I know what you did last summer', the third I did not find all that good. They just seem tired by the time #3 comes around, or the same characters are not used, and they try to revamp it. I am a fan of keeping to the original, which Scream has done. Now they are ready for number 4, 10 years after number 3, and at first I thought actually it may work because Scream follows a pattern and a specific storyline involving her mother. Then I heard that Neve Campbell may not be making her return as Sidney. Ok, here we go with 'Ill always know what you did last summer'. The main cast in the 3rd of that one was no longer but they still called it 'Ill always know'? Who is the killer talking to when the people he was pointing his finger at are not in that one? Shouldn't they have called it 'I also know what you did last summer'? This is what Im seeing with Scream 4 without Neve/Sidney. She was the heroin/victim throughout the franchise. Keeping the same title and changing the storyline all around I think would be confusing and a little too random this far in.

I can, however, see one possibility for a spin off type of movie. In the first two movies Sidney killed her killer, which in turn caused the next killer to come after her. Billy went after her, she killed him, his upset mother went after her, she killed her, so Roman decided to to the deed himself since Billy had failed and went after her, now the difference here is Sidney never actually killed him, Dewey did. So now maybe someone will avenge Roman's death by going after Dewey. At least going in that direction would keep in the flow of the story. If it doesn't it just doesn't seem like it would be Scream.

I'm a fan of both Wes Craven and Kevin Williamson, so I am excited for the next installment, to see how they tie things together. Just really hoping they follow the same storyline somehow like they have with the past 3. Hoping it's not a let down, and that it doesn't seem like they went to far by going with one more.

I love how happy he is

My best friend in the whole entire world got married last month. I am so happy for him, he deserves the greatest! It was a huge thing, and a very emotional thing to be asked to be in his wedding party. A little weird, I think, for some to see a girl up there. But his family understood. At first I felt kind of odd in a suit, but I got used to it. I do look a little strange in the photo of the guys all relaxed with their hands in their pockets, Ill have to admit. But anyway, it was a beautiful day, hot though, the photographer must love her job because photos took probably a good 4 hours. She does amazing work though, beautiful pictures were taken. These are just a couple that make me smile because of how proud and happy I am for him. Oh, and the one that I look like a goon next to the gentlemen, Id probably fit in a little more if I only had pockets!

It's Been A While

My goodness it has been a while since I have blogged on anything. One of the last blogs, aside from the off day, being about the fantastic trip...it has almost been two months since I ventured and met up with the girls in Wilmington. It's crazy, it still feels like it was just last week to me. I miss them dearly! Thanks to the internet the distance can be bridged and we can chat on a regular basis. And that we do. I am still so thankful for them. I do a lot of laughing, and probably look like a nut when Im in stitches at work and no one can figure out why. I look forward to when I can see them again! I am not sure when it will be, but its one day closer! I am saddened that Dani was not far from me and I didnt get the chance to meet up, I happened to be away and was not home in time to make the trek to see her. Love the mountains, but sometimes internet would come in handy out there!

In recent days I have went and saw a couple movies; My Sisters Keeper and Julie & Julia. I am big on seeing the film before the book. I want to be able to take the film as it is and as a standing alone project, and not pick it apart by how the book went, not compare it to anything and enjoy it. Im not a huge reader, so when I do read the book it helps give me the vision of the setting, and who the characters are. If I read the book first, then I will see something totally different, and I find the film awkward and hard to watch. I don't like that idea. I will watch the film again after the book, and do the comparing the second time around.

I was told that if I didnt cry during My Sisters Keeper that I had a heart covered in ice. I am not a cryer in movies, most of the time, so I was quite pleased when I did shed a few tears to know that I am not an ice queen. It was a really good movie, terribly sad though. Cameron Diaz did a great job! Now I have started reading the book and I am slightly confused. Im finding it quite choppy, jumping from each characters point of view. But I am going to stick it out, I have heard the ending to the film was different so I do want to see what has been changed. But Im glad I saw the movie first.

Last night I went and seen Julie & Julia. As much as I love Meryl Streep, I wasnt overly enthused on going to see this. Happy I did though, Meryl Streep is amazing! Every word she spoke I laughed, she did Julia Child amazingly!! The intermingling of the two true stories was beautifully done, well thought out. It was a little lengthy, usually I dont mind I think I was just tired. Amy Adams is also quite splendid. Quite dramatic in a humorous sort of way. My friends were quite upset with the ending, but personally I dont think you can be upset with an ending of a 'based on a true story' film. The writer doesn't choose the ending, no one chose the ending. I think you can sympathize, or empathize with the character in the end. A lot of us are touched or inspired by someone we have never met and their story, or music, or portrayal of a character close to us. We have this idea in our heads of who that person is, and we look up to them, think highly of them, and are grateful for the things they have done for us. Sometimes that idea should just remain that idea and not make the person a reality in our world. Once we do we could become disappointed in who they really are, or what they think of us doing something that they inspired us to do. I've been lucky in that I met one of my biggest inspirations and she was just as cool in person as she is on stage and in interviews. I hope that those who get the chance to thank the people they look up to get the same response, and not the one that Julie Powell did. But if they do end up in a situation like she did, that they handle it like she did, and saw Julia Child only for what she has done for her, and was still thankful to her for that. I think this story is great, or both these stories are great; that of Julie, and of Julia.

On the note of inspiration, Terri Clark's new album is about to be released in a few weeks! Really excited. They have been releasing clips each week from the songs on it. They are great! Check them out here. It has a similar feel to the Fearless album (which I love!). They are very real, and Terri has put aspects of her own life in the songs she has written. She took a brave leap in some of them. She took a brave leap in leaving her record label a while back too, she's taking control and it is awesome to see an album with so much of her writing on it. Also on the Terri topic, she has released a live album called Road Rage, which Im super excited to listen to! She is quite awesome live.

Tonight looks as though I may be off to see The Ugly Truth. Maybe this will be a week at the movies...Transformers tomorrow? Orphan? Harry Potter? hmm...

Just one of those days

It's been one of those days, typical monday; clutsy monday! It all started first thing this am, the clock hit 12:00am and it was now monday morning. To start my day I ran in to a post in my basement that braces the ceiling, it's been there for the last damn near 25 years ive lived in the house, but this morning I seemed to forget that it was there. This was after I woke up late for work and tripped over a stool in my room. Found out someone keyed the door on my Nitro (duck asses!). Got to work, pinched myself hanging up a part, not sure how I managed that one. Then I went to staple a receipt to an invoice and stapled the air, I completely forgot to put the papers in the staple, they were in my other hand. I think I have dropped everything that I have attempted to pick up. This afternoon I saw an awning ripped off a trailer and flapping in the wind, so I thought I should run out there and get a picture for warranty purposes. I went swiftly, but not swiftly enough, when I got there the instant downpour hit and soaked me from head to toe in probably 30 seconds...as I ran back I saw my dad laughing at me from the window. He asked what I was doing, and I told him...he proceeded to tell me that my shop foreman had noticed that rip months ago and the part was on order, so I really didnt need to go out there. We were out of styrofoam coffee cups up front, so I headed back to the fridge in the coffee room to find some, funny thing, there was no new styrofoam cups in the fridge. A funnel cloud touched down north of our shop, which is perfect because as much as I love storms, I am terrified of tornados. Now three hours after the crazy clouds have calmed our tractor driver has just come in to inform us that the temperature has dropped and it is now trying to snow-which I dont think it will but the thought of it is still unsettling. Ahh what a lovely day!

But really, most days like this would have irratated the shit out of me and I would have morphed in to oscar the grouch by the time I stubbed my toe, but for some strange reason I carry a smile on my face. I don't really understand why, alls I know is I enjoys it!

No words could truly capture

Once upon a time, in a land far away (for some) 8 girls gathered in a condo above the streets of downtown Wilmington. Not sure what to expect some prepared themselves with nerve calming potions. These potions caught on, and were well received and had by all, well almost all, throughout the week. The entire adventure was a magical experience, these 8 girls got along, enjoyed each others company, had a ball, and formed a bond.

I have been anticipating this trip for a couple months, but had no idea what to expect. All I know is I wasn’t expecting to leave having made some of the greatest friends. Kim, Megan, Becca, Andrea, Lauren, Dani, and Liz are the funniest, sweetest, craziest girls, and I had a blast with all of them! I am so lucky to have had this opportunity! One that I will never forget. There's a great collection of videos and photos taken by all that showcase a large part of this excellent adventure, there's just not a lot of words that can describe the experiance, and what it meant.

I met Kim and Liz Monday night before the rest of the gang arrived. I didn't think I was nervous, but I still didn't know what to expect. But at one point the waitress asked how we were and both Kim and I said nothing but gave her a thumbs up. We had a chuckle and that moment made me feel pretty comfortable with this gathering. We were able to joke about Canada/US differences right off the bat too, which was cool, we straightened out our north’s and south’s.

Tuesday began with the meeting of Megan, Andrea, Liz and myself. We checked out the condo, and went for some lunch at Cafe Phoenix. Again, we could laugh together right away. Jokes made about accents, which was kind of a reoccurring theme when you have 8 different ones. A little while later Becca and Dani arrived, I met them to help them with luggage, I didn't even ask where they were parked, thought of that after, I could have been meandering all over downtown. But, I found them, and by now I was so comfortable with the girls I met already, I knew this would be just like meeting an old friend, or so I was hoping, and it was. It was a 'hey, how are you? Need some help with that bag?’
After getting acquainted with everyone and did some dancing in the condo, got a little violent with some chocolate syrup, and did some cheersing, we took our first night together to Paddy's Hollow for some dinner, and some close calls with some sharp cutlery, also saw some magical beverage shooting, kudos to Kim. Violence became quite common. Then it was off to the Whiskey to see Bibis, which I thought was the perfect ice breaker for all of us. We cheered, probably loudly, and she realized the group that came, we proceeded to cheer louder, and she replied with 'Welcome to Wilmington bitches!'. Much wooing was had by Kim and myself, Megan and Andrea enjoyed some dancing. Many of us and other whiskey attenders enjoyed their dancing as well. Bibis was amazing, or I would say phenomenal but it was so much more. *shakes head at herself* By the end we were all shoulder to shoulder swaying together to Hallelujah. It was beautiful, it was like being at church according to Lauren. After Bibis it was time for a late snack, so Taco Bell it was! I ordered Megan a ‘double decker condo’, and lost one of Kim's twisty things (found it the next day, phewsh, I was worried about that).

Wednesday we went separate ways for a bit. Becca and I had a frustrating argument with the sofa bed, and after quite the struggle we were able to defeat it. We all met up at the Reel Cafe for lunch with a pedestrian. We enjoyed our first recap of night one, some lunch, and some water. We also got to check out the rooftop bar there, which was super cool, pretty view. Things were starting to get pretty toasty, so Lauren navigated us to our first trip to the beach, which was beautiful. Good laughs had again, some seagull chasing attempts were made here, a tumble, some squid/jelly fish poking (no one could quite figure out what it was), and some wonderful photographs were taken. Great time!!
Supper was had at the condo that night. Andrea made some lovely spaghetti! We enjoyed a great game of beer pong, had even more laughs as ping pongs were winged through the air, minor injuries occurred but all in good fun! Bon qui qui was quoted a lot, personally I think Lauren does a dead on impression! We also enjoyed a good game of waterfall. Becca I think was a little tipsy off her water. Megan also found some new words for the dictionary, and color wheel. She came up with the color suave’…. which we then had a conversation trying to figure out what color it would actually be. Another round was rhyming, and the word to by rhymed with was ‘tuba’, granted not a whole lot comes to mind…. but what is maruba?? All I know is that it made us break out in song, ‘Aruba, Jamaica, oh I wanna take ya to Bermuda, Bahamas…’ We quite often broke in to song. I loved it! I really enjoyed Becca’s rendition of ‘I went to the river to pray’ from Oh Brother Where Art Thou! We then decided to move our party outside of the condo, so we hit the streets of downtown and made our way to the Copper Penny to hang out, watch some baseball. We also made a stop back at the Reel Café. We turned in a little earlier that night (which really wasn’t all that early).

Thursday was another great day! A few went their separate ways again for a short time. Becca, Dani, Liz and I took a drive and saw some sites. I got out to snap a shot of an old house, a bee swarmed me and I jumped and flailed, and woo'd. When I returned the ladies in the car found it quite amusing how excited I was to see this house, they thought I was wooing and jumping up and down with excitement, I had to reassure them that the excitement was only that of being frightened by a bee.
We picked up Kim and Lauren for some more outings. 6 people in the car was quite cozy and quite hilarious. Really glad I was introduced to Chick-fil-a! Their milkshakes are great, and who doesn’t love an all chicken restaurant? Also very tricky to eat your chick-fil-a when packed in. Lauren had to 'dunk' (as she put it) when the cop drove by, got to be careful, don't want no tickets. We met KT at Screen Gem Studios for a tour of some of the OTH sets, and the new stage. It was amazing! Learned a lot, and saw a lot. Huge thanks to Kt for showing us around!! I also got pretty excited about a boat that was set outside, Becca found this quite amusing. We also made another stop down at the beach took a walk out on the pier, enjoyed a woman’s first shark catching experience. For dinner we met up with Kt at Caffé Phoenix. This was an amazing experience. Being able to chat with Kt and the others over a wonderful meal. I also had the opportunity to give him the message in a bottle with everyone’s letters, creativity and support from all over the world. It was so great to be able to see his reaction to all that. I am so grateful that these 7 girls got to experience that with me. After dinner was going to be a little more relaxing evening. This was the night we brought to life The Facts Of Life. The whole thing was hilarious! The outtakes were awesome. All our videos are quite random and so incredibly funny. Later on we headed back to the beach to check out some late night filming. This was really interesting. I quite enjoyed watching the process of it…out of the corner of my eye because we were told to ‘act natural’ while watching. Everyone started to get pretty tired so we made our way back to the condo. However Lauren, Becca, and myself weren’t really feeling like Mr. Sandman was headed our way anytime soon, so we stayed up giggling, and were in stitches at some points, Lauren’s sides were starting to ache. Pretty sure a lot of the laughter stemmed from a certain photo with a certain hairdo. We had an urge to head down to the river walk to watch the sun rise, Becca was so excited, but we changed our minds, poor girl was so disappointed. However, it’s a good thing we never went, little did we know that at 5:30am the sun rises in the east, not the west. So we totally would have missed it.

Friday was a full day for us. And I’m really glad it was, kept my mind from thinking about Saturday’s departure. We took a lovely walk through Airlie Garden’s. I was so confused why the tree’s there were hairy, but apparently it’s ‘spanish moss’. At one point I was pretty sure I saw a cat, but it was just more of the moss. We cooled off at the fountain; I was a little worried Andrea was going to take another fall inside there. But luckily she came out dry. We also came upon a huge flock of Canadian Geese, which was cool since I told Becca I would bring one, so boy did I deliver! Felt bad however by the mess they left, and that Liz had to come across it the way she did. After the garden’s we headed over to the Bellamy mansion, beautiful 140 year old home with incredible history. The return to the beach was next with our SoGoPro tshirts. Lovely photos were taken of us in them, and a fantastic video of us (not quite all of us) running in to the water was shot! The video turned out quite hilarious, Andrea biffed it before the water, Kim got to witness it first hand, which was funny to watch. We swam for a while, got beat up by a few waves, and buried Andrea in the sand. Our last night (sad face) found us making a vlog about our trip. It’s quite random, and there’s much laughing, but it really showcased our trip I think. The best part was probably Dani’s comment about the trip, ‘I think I am the only sane person here’. She was dead on. When the video was finished we made our way up one floor to Level 5. It is an awesome rooftop bar. We kind of ended it with the party we started it with; it was perfect. We hung out, did some dancing, enjoyed some music, and headed for pizza. That night 4 girls shared one futon and I took the floor with a fitted sheet, how do you sleep in a fitted sheet? 'Fitted' was Becca's answer. Megan turned on the camera when we returned and captured our last evening moment together, right up until we fell asleep-she forgot the camera was rolling, we all did. Becca tried to say goodbye that night so she wouldn’t have to wake us in the morning. That was not happening! I needed a moment that night, got a little teary eyed early on.

Saturday was an extremely sad day. The trip was coming to a close, this dream of a vacation was ending. The goodbye’s were hard, starting with Dani and Becca’s. We corrupted poor Becca all week, but she is so awesome, she gave us the perfect farewell with a ‘bye bitches’. Then it was Liz’s goodbye, I thought for a moment that the goodbye’s might get easier, gee was I wrong. Kim, Andrea, and Lauren came to the airport to bid Megan and I farewell. Thank goodness for sunglasses, there were a lot of tears hidden behind them. Megan got on my flight so we didn’t have to leave as early. So Megan called Kim to pick us up. At first it was funny, like thanks for letting me see the airport, now where we to? But then I realized we would have to do the goodbye scene all over again. So we got to spend a little more time together at Kim’s, watch some old school 90210, and enjoyed Andrea’s video some more. The flight was delayed, this should have just been the sign we were to stay, it wasn’t the first. We realized if this flight is delayed and our next one is on time we miss it, but the other one was delayed. So we were safe there, but that means I may not be safe on making it the one after that. We went to board, and Delta messed up and put Megan on a separate plane, she tried to threaten me before with ‘i will cut you’ to make me get on the plane, I’m glad I didn’t listen or I wouldn’t have gotten to say goodbye, even though it was really quick. Things got even sadder here because that was really the end. I sat down, turned on my ipod for comfort music, hit shuffle, and what song came on? Hallelujah, oh lordy, how perfect, but sunglasses had to remain on. I whispered woosah and settled in for my flight home.

The friendships, the memories, the laughs will go on. But it was so emotional because we had become so close over that one week, it’s an incredible thing, something that is hard to find the words for. I don’t even know if there are words to describe it, to portray the feeling from the experience, or what it has meant to me. I have never stepped outside, and ventured, and explored as much as I did last week. Southern Gothic has created a wonderful community, it is full of inspiration, and heart, and determination, and has already done so much for me; and now has brought me to these amazing people that I cherish and that I am forever thankful for. I am so grateful to SGP for this. I already miss them, and the fun craziness, and the laughter. I will see them again, hopefully sooner than later, but until then I will talk to these friends as often as I can, and anticipate that day.

Distractions are helpful

This probably has been the toughest few weeks I have ever had to go through. I have been lucky to have not lost many people I care about. I lost my grandfather at 13, and my best friend when I was 10. Loss is different as you go through life and get older, and you handle it different every time. Almost three weeks ago we had to do one of the hardest things Ive had to make a decision on. We had to put my dog to rest. We knew the time was coming, she was almost 14, and as happy, and as healthy as she made herself out to be, something wasn't right. She had trouble breathing the last little while. When we took her in that day, it had gotten worse just over night. They figured it was lung cancer. They said they could give her pills that would help, but not perfectly and for who knows how long. We did what was best for her, I couldn't see her suffer. I didnt think losing a pet could be this difficult. I miss her like crazy! She was the bestfriend a girl could ask for. But while it is still incredibly hard, Im thankful for the things that have been happening to keep my mind going. Work has been surprisingly helpful keeping me busy at this time of year. Friends have constantly been there, trying to keep me occupied, one is taking me to a concert this coming week for a little stress release. Tonight I went to see Chantal Kreviazuk, who is incredible!! And music really does help me through each day, the power of it is amazing. My upcoming trip has me so excited that I can't help but be glad thinking about it, helps when I start to feel sad again. I just think that Im getting away from here for a bit, and going to a place that is going to be happy, and fun, and filled with incredible people. SGP and the chat is such a great place to be; amazing people. My family has been awesome, its been hard on them, somedays I think its harder on them than me, but we are all going through it together. They continue to talk about her in good light, and talk about the funny things she did. She had such a fun personality, she would greet me everyday with a smile-literally, some thought she was showing her teeth in a mean way, but there were no growls about it, it was a full grin. I also keep hoping that if I continue to talk about her myself that it will get easier. For a little bit it felt that the days got more difficult. I guess the times like right now, where its quiet, and late, and no one around, is when I miss her most, I cant just go out to her bed and say hello, sit with her, or share a bowl of popcorn. But it will get easier, the happiness around me will continue to uplift my spirits, and the happy memories I have with my dog will continue to warm my heart. Im really thankful for everything and everyone around me, I think I would be lost without all this.

A story: Accent or No accent

I was a little nervous making this, its my first vlog. And I apologize for the words not matching the video, not really sure how to correct that yet.

So here is me reading the story, that MM and Vicki created, as a Southern Albertan, or Western Canadian, which really has no accent.

More Messages in a bottle...

...or possibly treasure chest. Everyone loves a treasure chest! Or maybe it's just the treasure that's appealing. I have been receiving more messages from across the globe, which is wonderful! I know we have some new friends in SGP, and would like to let them know what is going on if they would like to join. Everyone is sending in messages of thanks or encouragement or what SGP and the team have done for you and mean to you, poems, drawings, photos, quotes, by post or email. I am putting them in, what was going to be a bottle, and sending them to SGP. It was going to be like a message(s) in a bottle that has been all over the world, and makes its way to Wilmington. However, I dont think all the messages and such that I am receiving are going to fit in a bottle, so I think I shall figure out a chest of somesort, still the same idea however. I'd like to have it prepared for shipment by around June 8th-ish. Over seas shipping has been fairly quick, which is great. If you would like to join in on the messages please let me know so I know to keep a look out, I want to make sure all are in before sending. You can let me know here, or my email jaclyne.selvig@gmail.com . If you are emailing anything for the bottle/chest you can send it to that same email.

For postal my address is

Jaclyne Selvig
1501 15th Avenue South
Lethbridge, Alberta T1K-0W6
Canada

Thanks guys! This is going awesome :)

Ghost of my former self

Ghosts interest me, but not when they are of my former self. That is the only time I am afraid of them. I think I would rather have a poltergeist rummaging around my kitchen. My own ghost has followed me around for the past 4 years, or maybe even more. Haunting me, telling me what I used to be capable of. She walked behind me in a baseball uniform, with a pencil behind her ear, charcoal on her fingers gripping a novel, and a guitar slung over her back. She threw quick witted comments in my ear. I began to ignore her, put up a wall so I could not hear about what I had left behind. Things that I did that were important to me; music, art, sports, school. I still enjoyed music, and art, but it wasn't quite the same. Somehow as I moved forward in life, she remained behind. I didn't read, I didn't finish my college program, I felt like I forgot how to draw, I slowly forgot how to play the guitar, and baseball was no longer a game I played. It's scary for me to think that I left that, and tried not to think about it. I started a different college program 3 years ago, which was something that I was not really interested in, but my job wanted me to do it so I went. But in this last year I had the urge that I really did want to finish it, I didn't want to quit like I had before. I think that's when things started coming back in to place again. She returned. She banged on the wall I put up, wanting me to let her in. I was still hesitant. What if she taunted and I still couldn't do it. Things have inspired me in the last little while that allowed me to let her knock that wall down. The excitement that I was nearing the end of my apprenticeship, that I was going to complete it. A greatness I came upon that showed me that things are possible, to believe, that there are others out there setting out and getting what they want accomplished. I've been reminded of the power of words. I listen to music more intently. I see the beauty in the arts more clearly again. I've put my cleats back on my feet and I'm ready to run. Not sure where I am running to, but I can do this now. Have you ever seen Ghost Whisperer? When Jim dies and his ghost hops in to another man's body. This ghost is always there trying to remind him of who he is, but the body and mind of Sam creates a barrier. He feels like some things are familiar but not sure why, he battles with himself to figure out who he is. And then one day it just all comes in to focus, the ghost of Jim is who he really is, he is now the Jim he was before (aside from the new body of course). This is sort of how I have felt, and now that I am getting all that back, I don't have to fight a barrier, the ghost no longer can follow me. We are getting reaquainted. I'm no longer afraid to have her sneaking behind me, so it is safe to venture. That is exactly what I am going to do! I am going to go, see, do, listen, and have a blast! Don't think I'll wear my cleats however, they aren't as comfy as they used to be!

Struttin' and Singin'

I'm walking along, singing, beboppin' away, doin my strut, what's being played on my 'pod to make me do this? It could almost be anything! There's a long list that makes me just want to pick up the beat and lay it down on the sidewalk, possibly dance along the streets, shout out the lyrics!

Pain to Kill, I Wanna Do It All, Getting There, In My Next Life-Terri Clark
I love Rock & Roll, Hit Me With Your Best Shot-Pat Benatar
Bitch-Meredith Brooks
Hella Good, Spiderwebs, Excuse Me Mr-No Doubt
Walk Like An Egyptian, Manic Monday-The Bangles
Cat Scratch Fever-Ted Nugent
Sitting, Waiting, Wishing-Jack Johnson
These Boots Are Made For Walking-Nancy Sinatra
Walking After Midnight-Patsy Cline, (also Terri Clark's rendition)
Red High Heels-Kellie Pickler
I'm Outta Here-Shania Twain
The More Boys I Meet-Carrie Underwood
Sugar, Sugar-The Archies
9 to 5-Dolly Parton
Me and Bobby Mcgee-Janis Joplin (also Dolly Parton and Loretta Lynn)
Black Betty-Ram Jam
Mammia Mia, Take A Chance On Me-Abba
One Way Ticket-Leanne Rimes
Alberta Bound-Paul Brandt
Shout-The Isley Brothers
Walk Away, Miss Independant-Kelly Clarkson
Girls Night Out-The Judds
Halo-Bethany Joy Galeotti
Head Over Feet, Ironic, You Oughta Know-Alanis Morissette
Wonderwall-Oasis
Buddy Holly-Weezer
There's Your Trouble, Ready To Run, Taking The Long Way-Dixie Chicks
My Girl-Wolfman Jack
Heaven On Earth-Belinda Carlisle
Fancy-Reba
And of course I must add the Spice Girls. Most of their songs join me on my happy stride. Never Give Up On The Good Times, Stop, Wannabe, Do It, Move Over...

Oh there are probably plenty more! Maybe Ill need a side B, or playlist 2, or a to be continued...

A Girls Night Out with Holly Woods & Toronto

Last night was one of those nights that really will stand out. I stopped by a local pub to have dinner with my parents and fellow car club members who were there waiting to see a band; Toronto. I am always up for music, even music from the 80's. I wasn't planning on staying long, but once Holly Woods stood up to the mic, there was no leaving. Her voice reached every level of awesome. She could wail! That high pitch that could shatter glass, but still sounded unbelievable. She was funny, sweet, and could still rock after a hip replacement! Her sound is like Pat Benatar meets Heart, with a hint of Cyndie Lauper. Actually, her band disbanded in the mid 80's and she was excited and moved on with her solo career moving to Atlanta. One song of theirs had never been released anywhere; 'What about love?'. Holly said she was pulling out of her driveway one day and it came on the radio, she was amazed thinking it was Toronto! That was until it got to the chorus and realized it wasn't her, it was Heart. 'Oh my god, they stole my fucking song' is what she said. But she laughed about it, and told us she was happy and has spoken with the Wilson sisters and is proud. [I came home and read about her, and Wiki also compares her to P.Benatar and Heart.] The guitar player she had with her was the lead singer of Prism, Al Harlow, also a funny man. A friend of mine is really close with Prism, so he came and sat and chatted for a bit which was super cool. Her bass player Lisa Rae Simons was also incredible, not only on the bass but vocally as well. The keyboard player and drummer have been in the industry for years as well. One was with the band Zingo, which his fellow member moved on from to work with Bryan Adams. The talent and music history between all these musicians is incredible. I was in awe!

After a bit I went over and sat with Holly and L.Rae, got my picture taken, and chatted for a bit. Holly talked about how she came to be both from the US, and spent most of her growing years in Canada. She said she was from Durham, North Carolina, and that sparked even more in me. Being that I would really love to get there, not just to see, but UNCW is really where I want to be to start a film career. L.Rae said if there was anything I wanted to know about NC that I should sit and chat it up with Holly. I think we could have sat there all night, but they were getting ready to pack up.

Al on the guitar reminded me of how much I love that instrument, and how much I miss playing it. When he started playing a solo, I could focus only on the guitar, like it called to me, and nothing else was on stage. There wasnt even a stage, just music coming from the strings and his fingers. It makes me really want to pick up my Fender again.

They said it was great to see someone younger at one of their shows, my mom said that sometimes I still like to hang out with my parents, I told them that I just really enjoy good music. Thinking about NC and music and inspiration brings me to SGP. A lot of things that inspire me really came together last night in a round-about way. I am in full support of anyone, and anything that can reach to me, lift me, and inspire me. I purchased 3 cd's, two of which will probably never get played as they were signed, I just wanted to show them my appreciation. With SGP I did this with ordering a t-shirt. I just want to help these people, give them support, in any way, as they do so much for me! Its the next morning and Im still excited and feeling the vibe!

It should now be called Great Friday!

The secret from yesterday was revealed. I woke up, logged on, and there it was!! Truly is a Good Friday! How awesome are the t-shirts! They look amazing, cant wait for mine to arrive! Hopefully it fits! YAY! Im so excited that we can actually physically support Southern Gothic, and help get camera's rolling for Pedestrian by purchasing one!
Also, the pictures Conrad, Hil's brother, took are fantabulous! Beautiful photographs!

Also, the message in a bottle, Im hoping for the end of april, beginning of may to get it sent. There are some new people in the crew, so Im putting this out to them too if they would like to join in and send something to put in the bottle for SGP.
For email messages/scanned messages- jaclyne.selvig@gmail.com
For handwritten:
Jaclyne Selvig
1501 15th Avenue South
Lethbridge Alberta
T1K-0W6
Canada

The Circus!

I mention previously that I am a concert junkie. Ill go see anything and everything. This week was probably one of the most hyped up, most talked about concerts, next to the Spice Girls Reunion Tour, that I've been to. My friends and I packed up and headed North to see Britney Spears' Circus. It was so nice to get away, take a break from the stress of work and tests. It was a fun weekend all the way around. West Edmonton mall is always fun, did some shopping, saw the sea lion (cute!), and hit up the Galaxyland amusement park. We boarded most rides, except I sort of skipped the rollercoaster. I'm sort of glad I did because we did a simulated 'log' ride (we were logs being transported) with the 3d glasses and the chairs that move along to make you feel like you are actually there, and that didn't sit so well with me, so I can imagine what the big rollercoaster would be like. One day, one day. Driving in the big cities is always maddening! I've learned that you should never rely on the free map the hotel gives you in their brochures, and that GPS' are becoming a neccessity and it will not be long before I own one. The signs in Edmonton are nuts! The signs for the main roads that are upcoming, are right at the turning point, they give you no warning. And one ways-holy man! I think I got a few grey hairs from driving. But we came to expect this and gave ourselves lots of time so that it didn't make us run late getting anywhere. We also made sure that we were not going to drive to the Colissium, I love undergroud transit! It was all exciting though, met my cousins for dinner who I don't get to see often. The one is pregnant, and we were joking about how she wanted to go to the concert, but thought it was probably best if she didn't incase Mr Jaxson decided to make his early arrival. The next morning, day of the concert, she texted me...she was on her way to the hospital! Yay!
The concert, many people, everywhere! Not nearly as crazy as the Spice Girls though. Pussycat Dolls were pretty good, they seemed excited to be up there, interacted with the crowd, they didn't sound so lipsynched, which is good. Then there was Britney. Great show, the first 15-20 minutes was circus acts; hulahoops, unicycles, acrobattic ninjas. Britney decended from the rafters, the crowd went crazy. She was wheeled around in a cage and the stage circus rings were big targets, she floated from an umbrella, hung out in picture frames, did some Bollywood dancing-so overall it was pretty entertaining. However, she sounded very lipsynched. It basically sounded like I handed the sound man my cd and they put it in. So that part was kind of disappointing. And the setlist was not quite what I thought it was going to be either, I was thinking there would be more of her older songs, but there was only 4 or 5 I think. BUT it was still Britney Spears! So her being there was pretty incredible! She's been through a lot, and she's making a turn around, I do have a lot of respect for her.
The time went by so fast! I called my cousin the next morning, no baby yet, she was still waiting. So before hitting the return lane home, we stopped to see her. That was nice again, hoping for the best for her!
The whole trip was like a circus, it was fast, crazy, and a lot of fun. It's always nice to get away, returning home to exams, unexpected drama, and work is never exciting....but it makes me appreciate those fun moments so much more!

This Old House

I never really thought about my house having history, but after chatting in the blog a couple days ago about my findings of a skeleton key I realize it does. I knew about all these little things inside it, but never thought about them all at once. The house was built in the mid 30's, but had a face lift about 15 years ago. The basement was done first, thank goodness! The stairs going down were dark, and creeky, the old worn carpeted kind. When you neared the bottom you could hear the growl of the furnace. I dared not look towards it, the fiery glow in its throat would cast spooky shadows on the wall. Making the normal household objects almost come to life. I felt like they would nearly be able to reach out and grab me, sucking my in to the shadows with it. It would send shivers down my spine, and I would turn around and go running back up the stairs. Next to get done was my bedroom, which is now the living room. A door from the dining room swung in to a platform, and three steps going down. It was massive! I loved it, my own little house. Under the stairs were my treasures, which at 5 was a plush Popples, my doll freckles, and some other random toys I thought were grand. When we took apart the walls, it made sense as to why this room was so long and narrow. The wall that face the end of the drive way was not a wall, but barn doors, I actually had been living in the previous owners garage. They still had the hinges and could be swung out on the the driveway.
The wall paper in the living room, in my opinion, belonged downstairs with the creepy furnace. The patterns were done in silver, and when you looked closely they looked like hundreds of devil faces each about the size of a small hand. I tried to find a picture of one, but no such luck.
Off the living room was the front entry, when we took it apart, the secrets of the house started to be told. Between the walls of the door was an old envelope addressed to a previous owner, in it was an old Christmas card. Beneath the floor of the porch was a hollow space, and when we opened it up we found a key. I loved this part, it was a skeleton key! Somewhat spooky lying in the bottom of a deep hole, but so many stories could lie with it.
Another odd object was found in the cabinet the fridge sat in, around back and up on the ceiling was a secret hole, in it was a small bullet. Why a single bullet was hidden up there, Im not sure. Around the side of the house, when we did some landscaping and digging, we found a hole deep down, at one time one would assume it was a well. I wondered if it was from this house, or maybe a previous house stood there. Either way, how many wished could have been made there? So many hopes and dreams could be down there.
I think the most interesting part of the house though would have to be the pillow in the wall. What on earth is a pillow doing in the wall? Well I guess my parents talked and asked around, and did some research. They found out that the pillow was put in the wall for the ghosts, so that they had somewhere to rest instead of making their way in to the house and haunting it. This was so interesting, and such a cool thing to find, so when we put the new walls together we made sure that the pillow got put back in. I don't think I would want to take my chance removing it now. Who knows how many spirits I have slumbering in my walls.

1st Message Floated In From Switzerland!!!

Most days I am not a fan of checking my mail as there usually seems to be a bill of some sort looming in the mixture of useless flyers. But today, not only did I get flyers, bills, and a birthday card for my mom, but a package from SWITZERLAND! Big thank you Danielle!! I have never been so excited about mail before. But the feeling I got receiving the first package was incredible. It's amazing to see, and now be able to hold in my hands something from someone being touched by SGP from the opposite side of the world, someone whom I have never met, but have had the opportunity to chat with. It really opens my eyes even more to possibiliy and the power of inspiration. The card she sent me was beautiful as well, truly touched by it!! Again, thank you Danielle!!! Can't wait to check my mail now!

Girlfriend/Boyfriend Scenario

The SGP prop list got my brain a-working. So I was trying to write a short scenario but it kind of got away on me. So here is my attempt, and sorry I am definately not meant to be a writer, but it was fun!

Girlfriend Gator, a well-dressed businessman, makes his way to the Dollar Holler. A place he visits daily to get his cigarettes. But this time was different, behind the counter was a new face, the most beautiful girl he has ever laid his eyes on. As he approached to pay for his cigarettes, he noticed her nametag, ‘Boyfriend Peacock-trainee’. Having a peculiar name himself, this intrigued him even more. Not saying so much as a hi, and a thank you, Girlfriend Gator left. The next days and nights, the trainee was all he could think about. He pondered her name; she was so beautiful and timeless, that to him, the name was elegant and charming. He dreamt of her bright lips, to him, they made her classy yet sophisticated. He wondered where she came from, why she was working at the Dollar Holler. These days he still went in for his cigarettes, still not saying so much as a ‘hi’, and a thank you, and she never spoke back. This made him wonder even more about her. Could she speak? What did she sound like? Did she speak English? That was until the one day she said ‘hi’ in return. Her voice sang to him. Now, to most others, she may sound and looks just like another face in the crowd. To him she just became more angelic with every new thing he learned about her.

He began to write poetry about her, pages and pages of words. Sometimes the words weren’t about her, but how she made him feel. His days seemed brighter with seeing her to start them off. Soon there was not much he could learn about Boyfriend that was new, as she didn’t really talk, he had nothing else to write his poetry about, nothing new and exciting to inspire. So Girlfriend decided it was time to strike up conversation. In to the Dollar Holler he strolled. He took up his cigarettes, but this time he added a pack of gum. Remember that she often chewed gum; he asked her if this kind was good; simple conversation to start. Boyfriend said she never really like regular gum, she said she preferred bubblegum. Girlfriend, being a business, man said that he probably shouldn’t chew bubblegum in professional meetings. He said thank you, and he would have to try her bubblegum one-day soon, told her to have a nice day, and made his way proudly out the door. Happy with his first conversing attempt he made his way to work. Again, the next days he went in trying new small talk attempts. Finally he had the courage to ask her out. Boyfriend agreed, saying the parade was on Saturday and she would love to go to that. Also adding that the tuba was her favorite instrument. Girlfriend said that was perfect, and asked if they could just meet at the Dollar Holler and go from there. Boyfriend then asked what his name was. When he replied with ‘Girlfriend’, she grinned, saying that was the strangest name she ever heard, but thought it was great.

Saturday came around; Girlfriend got himself ready, putting on his best parade attire and headed to meet Boyfriend. Not thinking that it was possible, Boyfriend looked more amazing than she ever had. Her bright lips stood out even more, her hair waved in the wind, and the sunlight illuminated her yellow sundress. They said their hellos and off they went to take their seats along the parade route. They talked through most of the parade. They were both fascinated by each other. The only time they were focused more so on the parade was when the tubas went marching by. Boyfriend stood up and danced to the sound of them, most people looked at her oddly, but Girlfriend looked up at her from the curb, he was amused, and happy watching her. She never really had an answer to why she loved the tuba, which was fine; he didn’t have an answer to why he could only smoke fancy colored cigarettes. Both were slightly quirky, and had the oddest of names. Girlfriend wanted to know everything there was to know about Boyfriend, but decided he should save some of that for another date. He was content with knowing she always wanted a dollhouse growing up, but her parents could never afford one, so she made her own out of cardboard boxes. He also learned her favorite dessert was cherry pie, her favorite color was blue, and her parents embraced their last name so much that they once had a pet peacock. As weird as she once thought it was, she missed that peacock a lot, it was her best friend growing up. Other kids had dogs and cats, her parents thought they were too much hassle. As the parade came to a close, Girlfriend said he would love to see her again outside the Dollar Holler. She agreed to a dinner, something more formal.

The plan was for the following weekend. Girlfriend wanted to do something special for her. So he rounded up all his tools, wood, & paint, and spent the next evenings hard at work in his workshop. He would get up earlier in the morning and spend time in his kitchen, practicing his baking before going to work. The Friday before their date he went in to the Dollar Holler later in the day, just to confirm plans. But she was not there, no one was there, but it looked as though some disturbance had occurred. The place was upturned. Panicked, Girlfriend went to the police station, told them Boyfriend Peacock was missing from the Dollar Holler. Said her shift didn’t end for another three hours, and that the place was unlocked and looked like someone made a disaster out of it. He told them his name was Girlfriend Gator, which he had some trouble getting them to believe. He said he didn’t know much about where she lives, or whom she knows. They told him they would look in to it, and he asked them to notify him when they found anything out.

The next few days had Girlfriend in a craze. Worried about Boyfriend, he paced his house, the streets, and sat across from the Dollar Holler hoping for the possibility of some kind of clue. While he waited he wrote poems again. Some were more sad, others angry. Coming to a crossroads of his feelings he wrote one about love. None of his other poems had been about love, but more of beauty, grace, and infatuation. The more he thought about her, and what she has meant in his life even after just a few weeks, he realized it was love. He could not handle the idea of not seeing her first thing in his mornings and not learning new things about her life. He wanted to be able to tell her what she meant to him, tell the world what she has done for him. He wrote his love poem while he sat in a park not far from the Dollar Holler. He folded and put it in the tree he sat under with hopes someone would one day find it and read about an unspoken love, or by some chance that she may find it and possibly know deep down it was him. He just wanted someone to know, he wanted to let it out. He never felt like this before, and now he was trapped with her missing.

On his way walking back home, he heard some voices behind some nearby trees. It sounded like a scuffle. He peered through the brush to find a man holding a tied up woman at the side of a bridge. The man was dressed in black with a hat on his head. He had a ‘Snidely Whiplash’ mustache on a face that looked more like a rat than man. He had an evil laugh as he fought against her attempts to wiggle free. Girlfriend went running through the brush to the bridge and gave the man a punch to the face. The man let go of Boyfriend and she dropped to the ground, still trying to free herself from the ropes. Girlfriend and the caped man continued to fight. The man gave Girlfriend a good shove to get him off him for a brief moment to reach for his sword. Seeing the sword Girlfriend panicked. Boyfriend screamed, and scooted away from the man as fast as she could. Girlfriend couldn’t fight fist with sword so he whipped out the only weapon he had, a jackknife. The man gave the evil laugh at Girlfriend’s weapon of choice. Staying out of swords reach, Girlfriend flung the knife at the rat, it startled the man to move out of the way, and he stumbled over his cape and toppled backward over the bridge. Ironically under the bridge was a real ‘gator. The gator gobbled up the rat in no time at all. Girlfriend Gator peered over the edge and watched with a smirk across his face. Boyfriend cleared her throat impatiently still trying to wiggle free. Girlfriend rushed over apologizing and untied her. He helped her off the ground, she thanked him, they shared their first kiss and they walked back towards the trees.

The next evening Boyfriend met Girlfriend at his house. As she approached the steps she noticed something sitting in front of the door. As she got closer to where the light hit the object she realized it was a dollhouse, beautifully handcrafted and painted blue. On the front porch of the small house sat a sparkling peacock. She walked up to it and ran her hand along the roof. She was amazed; it was wonderful. Girlfriend opened the door slowly; Boyfriend looked up and smiled at him with a tear in her eye. She thanked him and hugged him. No one has ever done anything so generous, and thoughtful for her before. The dollhouse meant the world to her. The two went in and had a lovely dinner. For dessert Girlfriend brought out a wonderful cherry pie with sparklers that he lit before entering the dining room. She asked him what the sparklers were for. He said that they reminded him of her. Like her they were bright, warm, lively, and enjoyable. There was something magical about the sparks as they danced in all different directions.

Though he could now tell her how he felt, the poem he wrote remained in the tree. Hoping to bring wonder, inspiration, and love to another.

More Than A Feeling

Southern Gothic has inspired another blog, and has opened me up to new music, which is exciting. So thanks SGPstreetTeam for sharing yours, they are all awesome! Music holds a key in my life, it can open a door to any emotion, memories, a random feeling of joy, sadness, it inspires...it really can do anything. Without music the world would be too quiet, people wouldnt dance, voices would have a hard time being heard, things would seem dark. Ill just list a couple songs that really open me up, make me feel, help me through each day.

No Fear-Terri Clark
all I ever wanted was right here
but I had to reach way down inside
I had to have faith I'd find, No Fear
I want peace, love, and understanding, a stogie, and an ice cold beer, dont want to live afraid of dying

Standing Outside the Fire-Garth Brooks
There's this love that is burning Deep in my soul
Constantly yearning to get out of control
Wanting to fly higher and higher
I can't abide Standing outside the fire

Not Ready To Make Nice-Dixie Chicks
It’s a sad sad story when a mother will teach her Daughter that she ought to hate a perfect stranger And how in the world can the words that I said Send somebody so over the edge That they’d write me a letter Sayin’ that I better shut up and sing Or my life will be over

More Than A Feeling-Boston
I looked out this morning and the sun was gone
Turned on some music to start my day
I lost myself in a familiar song
I closed my eyes and I slipped away

Livin' On a Prayer-Bon Jovi
we gotta hold on to what we've got
it doesnt make a difference if we make it or not
we got each other and that's a lot
for love we'll give it a shot

Breakaway-Kelly Clarkson
Ill spread my wings and I learn how to fly
Ill do what it take 'til I touch the sky
and Ill make a wish
take a chance, make a change, and breakaway

Ok I should stop there, cuz this list just goes on, and on, and on...strangers, waiting, up and down the boulevard. haha sorry thats another one-Journey 'Don't Stop Believing' Some will win, some will lose, some are born to sing the blues, oh the movie never ends, it goes on, and on, and on...

Bottle Scouting

So I think I shall start looking around tonight, see if I can find out who has large bottles in town. Larns had a good idea, you could scan a handwritten message and email it in to me as well. Good idea! The date is still open on when I will be sending this. Im going to wait until I start receiving messages, just so I can tell how long shipments take from various places.

So you can email or scanmail to jaclyne.selvig@gmail.com

or if you are mailing:

1501 15th Avenue South

Lethbridge, AB

T1K-0W6

Canada

I decided to put my address up on here, Im not too terribly worried, it just might be easier this way. But if you could still let me know if you sent something so I can watch for it, and make sure I have everyones, that would be cool :)

No Fear

Nerves are starting to run rampid! I have no idea why I am nervous, well I do, but I shouldn't be. I'm finishing my third and final year of my apprenticeship program, and my exams start next week; my in class college final, my third year provincial final, and my Canadian Red Seal exam on all 3 years. Being a parts technician is not really what I have in mind to be doing the rest of my life, so just as long as I pass the first two, I should be fine, but Im not. Im terrified of failing at something I dont even want to be. I should be happy to just get this behind me and start seriously looking in to film schools. Maybe that is what's scaring me, deep down I know that once I start looking for schools, that means I have to start packing my bags, and uprooting myself from my tight nit friends and family. And its just not moving north, or to the next province over. To be where I want to be is on the opposite coast, about 2534 miles from home, a 40hour drive. Just the thought of moving scares me like nothing else! Im not a big fan of change, and it's holding me back. So I think for now, I will just take the tests slowly, try and stress about only the tests, its only a test not a change of life. And Ill just keep playing this song repeatedly, the one song that helps me breath easy for a moment, one of my biggest releases. And it reminds me that Terri Clark did this very thing, uprooted herself from a small southern Alberta town, headed to Nashville, and did whatever it took to make it.

I want a road stretching out before me
I want a radio in my ear
I want a full tank of absolution
No fear

I want a rainstorm to pull me over
Then a sky that begins to clear
Towards the truest of destinations
No fear

I used to hit every wall there was
I used to run away from love
All I ever wanted was right here
But I had to reach way down inside
I had to have faith I'd find
No fear

I want the world to just keep on turning
I want the dawn in my rear view mirror
I want to hear my own voice singing
No fear

And when I need two arms around me
And theres no one near
When I'm alone let the only sound be
No fear

I used to hit every wall there was
I used to run away from love
All I ever wanted was right here
But I had to reach way down inside
I had to have faith I'd find
No fear

I want peace, Love and Understanding
A stogie and an ice-cold beer
Don't want to live afraid of dying
I used to hit every wall there was
I used to run away from love
All I ever wanted was right here
But I had to reach way down inside
I used to stay up all night long
Wondering what I was doing wrong
All I ever needed was right here
But I had to reach way down inside
I had to have faith I'd find
No fear
~Terri Clark

Message In A Bottle

So the new video posted by Hil and Nick totally rocks! Rather random, I love random. So excited for the short as well! I bet it is going to be fantastic! It left us in suspense!! What was on that note!?! Im dying here! haha ok maybe not, but cliffhangers really get me! haha

ok, so on another note...no pun intended...ok yes pun intended actually. On the chat they were talking about leaving notes in trees, and messages tied to balloons and such, and I thought, 'hm i have always wanted to leave a message in a bottle'. Now, its not very likely that the Old Man River here will get the bottle very far...but thanks to UPS bottles can go anywhere! Im thinking that I could find a large bottle, and everyone can jot down a message, Ill put them all in and ship (not a water ship, but a land ship, kind of related to water) it to SGP. Handwritten messages always seem so personal. And messages in bottles are so much fun to come across! If everyone is in, the messages will be coming from all over the world, and its sort of like the bottle travelled that course as well. Messages could be handwritten and sent, and I would put them in the bottle, or emailed if its easier, and I would print them off and put them in. Just wondering everyones thoughts on this. If you want to handwrite or send pics, please email me and I will give you my address,  :)

No deadline quite yet, a lot will be coming from overseas, so that may take a little longer. Ill let everyone know when I start getting some in!

What's with the sadness? Bring on the mountains!

In the past couple weeks I have seen The Reader (again), Revolutionary Road, and Road to Rodanthe. I dont know if it maybe has something to do with movies starting with 'R', but what tragic films! Dont get me wrong, they are beautifully done, amazing writing and acting. And then with One Tree Hill and the tragedy happening there...sheesh thats a lot of heartbreak. Wonderful though. All of them! Such talent again! So I think I need a break from the sadness. Well, Im not really sad, but a break from watching sad things, but I loved watching them, so I dont really want a break from something amazing like that.....more maybe a break from work. Thus, I shall skip town and head out west! Rockies here I come!!

What my heart needs now is rest

So I'm packin up and I'm headed west

My mind's made up I put it to the test

Pushin myself and this old machine

Burnin fumes and what's left of my dreams

Let 'em go 'cause I don't need no strings

Just give me a road and a little gasoline

~Terri Clark's A Little Gasoline

Ok, so the song as whole doesnt apply to me at the moment, but I like this part, its rather fitting to my westward travels. Oh, and my machine is not old, and I hope I dont have to push it, because that would totally not be fun!

I heard there is three feet of snow in the mountains, and I cant take my trailer because its supposed to snow on the day we leave, and for my first trip towing that far, might be a little sketchy, so we are sleeping in the good ol' Nitro! Brr, but with enough of that cold liquid that gives you that warm and fuzzy feeling, Im sure we will be fine! Oh the excitement is building, Ive been waiting since september to go camping, and the moment has arrived! Hopefully I will get some great photos out there!

So much emotion

Tonights One Tree Hill was fantastic! The drama was great, and quite emotional. The actors did a fabulous job bringing that to us. The Julian/Brooke scenario really hit home, Ive been in that situation, I was the Brooke, and it was really hard to be upfront about those feelings without hurting him. One of the hardest responses Ive had to give. And it is really difficult to go on acting like it didnt happen, because as much as you want to forget that they love you, and you're not at that point, you cant. Its awkward, and its a terrible feeling hurting someone, and knowing they are hiding their feelings, sticking it out, and waiting until you feel the same. The Dan and Deb scenario was intense, and it was great to see even just a picture of Keith. Mouth and Milli was sad, but I feel thats not the end for them. It was nice to see Nathan and Haley have their moment. And I really hope that we see more music from Haley, awesome how Nathan is so supportive and wants her to go for it. BUT the big kudos, in my mind, goes to Hilarie and Chad for awesomeness, and a heartbreaking, and beautiful performance. WOW they were amazing. The emotion was so real. Ill admit, I cried...a lot. Such a tragic arc. Hilarie is a killer crier and great at delivering the feeling, so much passion, I truly felt the frustration, the pain, and the want. Beautifully tragic! The end of that episode has me feeling so many different things, its amazing when that kind of emotion can be brought out because of the amazing talent of writers and actors; how they can really tug at the heart strings. Simply amazing.
So as I am feeling all this different emotions, I hop in to the SoGo chat, and its an instant smile on my face. It is just such a positive and upbeat environment! It hit 600 followers today, and it was really exciting! No emotion was seen on faces, but it really felt energetic and excited.
Oh the greatness of all this!! Love It!!!

Limericks are rather fun!

Southern Gothic has created a new challenge, and its so much fun. Creating limericks, how fitting for the upcoming festivities of St. Patty's Day! I'm not so good at them, but I gave them a whirl haha

We have Nick, Kelly, and Hilarie Burton
They've started up Southern Gothic Production
Stories to be told
How will they unfold?
Something wonderfully brilliant has begun

Staring out the window sat Lincoln
Minding his business, and doing some thinkin'
Open flew the door
In strides Jay Moore
What happened next would have Mona Mills take up drinking

SoGoPro is on fire.
With writings they inspire,
Dreams will come true.
In whatever they do,
Our fondness for them only gets higher.

Beauty, brains, and wit
She even likes to knit
Miss Hilarie Burton
This is for certain
She's totally going to rock it

The stories have me gazing,
Anticipation is raising.
Nicholas Gray
What can I say?
Your words really are amazing!

St. Patrick's day is almost near,
I shall raise my glass in a cheer.
Thanks to SoGo,
For giving me hope.
Now lets all go share some green beer!

I do believe I think Im done,
I really need to leave and run.
Must get to work,
boss will go berzerk
But this limerick thing is way too fun!

Concert Junkie

My name is Jaclyne, and I have an addiction...

tis true, no joke, I am a concert-aholic, I will pretty much go to anything and everything if I have the available funds and time. I've been to bands like Gob, and Matt Good, and I've seen Canadian popstar winners Velvet Empire, 50's greats like Little Anthony and the Imperials...Bowser from Sha na na. I went to BSB and New Kids last year! haha yes I even laugh at myself, but I must say Natasha Bedingfeild and Lady Gaga were great openers for NKOTB. I've been to George Strait, Toby Keith, Keith Urban and Brad Paisley, incredible male performers, and then I have been to Reba, Shania, Carrie Underwood, and the Dixie Chicks, who rock the female country genre. Those are just to name a few. My all-time favorite artist being Terri Clark puts on a fantastic show, she's always full of energy, and is incredibly funny! Dixie Chicks was probably one of the most phenomenal shows I have ever seen, and not far behind was Reba with Kelly Clarkson. I dont even think I could describe the feeling I had sitting there, it was just incredible, vocally amazing, and these woman have such a large presence to them. Dixie Chicks got a random standing ovation from the crowd for Not Ready To Make Nice, cheers the whole way through and for many minutes afterward. One of the most surreal concerts I have been to, one that took me back about 10 years, and seriously turned me back in to a screaming 13 year old again, was the Spice Girls Reunion. WOW the loudest crowd, craziest merchandise tables line ups, and the outfits worn by fans looked like they came right out of the closests of 1998 Spice Girls #1 fan. I felt like I was part of the craze that happened between 1996-1998, the whirlwind of Spice World, it was insane. There were a few artists on my 'must see' list, Terri of course-check, Reba-check, Dixie Chicks-check, Shania-check, Spice Girls-check(never thought I would ever get to cross them off), Backstreet Boys-check(more so wish I could have checked them back when I was a crazed fan, but at least I got too), and the other on the list was No Doubt...they faded away about 5 years ago while Gwen stepped out on her own, never actually thought they would get back together, and my friend knew I had always wanted to see them so she took me to see Gwen Stefani, wicked cool, so i considered that a partial 'check'. But as of July 15 2009 I will actually be able to check them off!!!!! HELLA GOOD!! OH and rewind to 1998, a little blonde girl stepped in to the music scene and took it by storm, and everyone got caught up in her stories, her music videos were fun, and performances on MTV and much music made us wish we could witness it first hand...now once again, as I did with Spice Girls, BSB, NKOTB, and will be with No Doubt Im getting that chance to go back and experiance it...less then a month and Im off the the CIRCUS! :)
Now Celine just has to make another round...

Websters Dictionary Proposal

Everyone has been saying how amazing Southern Gothic is. So Raquel suggested in the dicitonary, under the word 'Amazing' it should say Southern Gothic Productions, I said the logo should also be seen, that would be great...and then under the word 'Great' : see 'Amazing' .
So here is the proposal that shall be sent to Mr. Webster (if I knew his address lol)

Dear Mr. Webster.

Upon recent events, and up-and-coming new adventures, a wonderful project has started, and it has brought so many people together, and is doing such amazing and great things, hopes and dreams are being brought to reality. They are truly a wonderful company, and such warm, and honest people. They are really going to do fantastic things. I am proposing that under the words amazing and great, the definition should be as follows:

a-maz-ing (uh-mey-zing) adj.
causing great surprise and sudden wonder, of greatness


great adj.
-of extraordinary powers; having unusual merit; very admirable; important; notable; remarkable; exceptionally outstanding
-also 'see amazing'

Thank you for your consideration

Massiveness of the Night Sky

So, Im arriving home last night, and I look up, something I do all the time. The night sky is fascinating to me. I was going to be an astrophysics major, well aside from taking film studies. But sadly these never happened, my physics mark just wasnt where I wanted it to be, and there is no film school in my proximity. But still anything involving these subjects takes up a lot of my time. I get lost in both. Id stand in the middle of a field, or the middle of my street, and gaze up, for long periods of time, it made me feel so small, that the universe goes on forever, and think how massive those stars really are, I am but a dust particle in one spec of that universe. But as Im talking to new people, from everywhere in the world, thanks to SGP, I looked up there last night and it felt more closed in, my world was smaller, but yet larger in the sense of the universe. Its also a neat feeling to look up and think that someone thousands of miles away, can look up and see that exact same thing at some point. Its so real. That picture thats real, and not a picture at all, is right above me, in the place I am in, and it will also be in someone else's backyard, town, farm, or place they are in. Where as a tree in my backyard, is only in my backyard. We share a part of our home with every person around the world, the true roof over our heads!

The SoGo Community!

This wonderful place that started out as a place to show fans what is going on, and keep us informed, has turned in to this incredible community, that feels like a little family. Everyone is so supportive, not only to Hilarie, Kelly, Nick, and Austin, but to each other as well. Everyone is taking in what Hilarie and Kelly have done, and responded in awesome ways, from tshirt making, which they are great and so awesome that Kelly has put some up on the site, to vlogs themselves, and Podcaster Denise's voicemails! I thought the voicemails were brilliant! So neat to hear everyones voices, and awesome to hear the out pour of encouragement, and how everyone was inspired. Little awkward hearing myself though LOL. Also, Im so excited to see the video that Megan Mary is putting together! All these people are so creative, its great, and so much fun to talk to as well! Cant wait to see what else everyone dreams up and starts! Oooh the excitement! :)

Southern Gothic Productions Banner

Shoutout and thanks to Pfeiffer and Megan Mary for the linked banner for SGP!! It's awesome!

Let SGP/Hilarie Burton Hear Your Voices!!

Denise over at One Tree Hill Podcast has set up an awesome idea for her Mondays podcast. You can leave a message of your support and encouragement for the Southern Gothic Team, and/or Hilarie Burton. She will be sending the messages to Hilarie and Kelly Tenney, some will be airing on the podcast. You can call 828-398-0310 to leave the message.



Hope everyone picks up that phone and gives a ring in!!!

Bizarre...A Little

So Im driving to work this morning, listening to the radio, and I hear the strangest of things....SPIDERMAN THE MUSICAL! Oh man. I'm all for musicals, but a singing man in blue tights dancing while shooting webs from his wrists, and fighting green goblins and such...seriously? So Im thinking, wow, now Ive heard everything! But boy was I wrong, I hadnt heard everything until the next comment made; also in talks for becoming a musical....SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE! what!?! It must have been the dance sequence at the end to make this a possibility. Dont get me wrong, I loved this moving, but theres something that is not so inticing about watching a boy sing his answers sitting in the hot seat. So many films, and literature can be turned in to a stage performance, but I think these are two that really shouldnt make this list. I am however, excited for, and hopeful that it makes its way to America (and Canada, but thats not likely), Sister Act A Devine Musical Comedy!! Whoopi Goldberg will not be acting in it, but she is helping produce it. Its opening in London, which I dont think I will get a chance to make it too...but I hope it does spectacular!! The score is by Alan Menken, who is fantastic, he's done a lot of Disney movie songs for Aladdin, Little Mermaid, Beauty & The Beast; so the music should be great. It was written by a Bill & Cheri Steinkellner, who had writting credits on Cheers. So there is a lot of talent behind this musical. Loved the movie, and this is something new and fresh stemming from it, so I think it will be great! This is definitley one of the movies I could see becoming a musical, but Spidey and Slumdog? Just seems rather strange to me.

The Academy Awards

Watching the Oscars is an amazing event! So many gifted people all in one room; actors, producers, writers, directors...

Each nominee truly deserved the credit they received, and every person/film not nominated from last year, still deserves a nod.

This event was great, emotional, and fun. Slumdog was so well received, and the children from that movie were glowing on the red carpet. It's so great that they get to be a part of it all! Again this art form has reached all the way around the world and brought so many different cultured people together.

I loved how they presented the awards for supporting actress/actor and best actress/actor awards with an ensemble of past winners in that category. Really great to see the company that these amazing performers were joining, very welcoming.

Hugh Jackman is doing a wonderful job! And the performance with him, Beyonce, and co. was awesome!

Of course, Heath Ledger's win for best supporting actor was very touching! It was amazing to see his family there for him, accepting the award.

Queen Latifa's performance was beautiful, and so moving! She is an amazing woman! I think it was a perfect way to honor those that were lost in the industry.

I finally saw The Reader yesterday, and I think Kate Winslet winning for best actress was fantastic. She was stunning, and did a spectacular job! A very brave role to take on. Everything she has done has been so great! Im so thrilled that she has finally received this honor!! haha and loved how she asked her father to whistle and he did! Also, her Meryl Streep comment was awesome, so true.

Sean Penn for best actor was awesome, great actor, great performace. All the men were deserving, but I think this win was special so he could deliver that speech. With what's going on in the world now, it was so fitting, I applaud him for what he said.

I loved Penelope Cruz's speech! It really goes with what I believe and what is inspiring this blog.
"I always felt that this ceremony was a moment of unity for the world, because art in any form is and has been and will always be our universal language"

Southern Gothic Productions = Inspirations

So here I am on a friday night, hanging out at home, lame right? Thats what I thought too....that is until I was doing my cruise through the Southern Gothic Productions blog. This blog is fantastic! Hilarie Burton, Kelly Tenney, and Nick Gray, have really let us in to a world that is so incredible! A universe they are creating, and letting us join them in, and keeping us informed throughout the process. It's amazing to see the interest that people are taking, and the interest that these 3 are taking in us. Its really cool to see how real these people are! It gives us an inside to a place we normally only get to see the finished product in. It's great to be a part of something that is my dream, and passion. It makes this world called film seem a little bit smaller, and a lot more possible. And the people that have taken on to this Southern Gothic greatness are so full of life, and creativity, and passion. Its inspiring to have people to relate to, that have a common interest, and drive. It's truly giving me that jump to want to move on to what I truly want to do, be a part of the industry that is Hollywood!! Okay, maybe not so much Hollywood, but that industry that can reach out to everyone in some way, to entertain them, to inspire them, to give them an escape, or hope. I've met very talented, fun, friendly, creative, down-to-earth, awesome cool people through the chat/blog this evening, Kim, Liz, Eddie, Becca, Geoh, Pfeiffer (the King!)...to name a few. Its amazing, and kind of comforting, to know these people are out there and going for it, and trying, and being involved in film/entertainment, and that they are no where near me, but I can still connect to them, get encouragement, advice, share interests. I also found out some wicked places I need to check out in Savannah...where the music scene is, ghost sitings....tour in a hurse!! Creepy...yeah probably...Gothic like if you will! Should totally check out the site, if you havent yet!!